Three factors may influence the effectiveness or otherwise of daycare:
Bryant (1980) found that three quarters of children in the care of childminders/babysitters had problems in language development. But many of these care-givers were not professionally trained or qualified. It may be that babysitters are more concerned with satisfying the child's physical needs (feeding, changing) rather than helping with cognitive skills.
Most research has concentrated on nursery care, e.g. Anderrson (1992). See description of the study.
Vandell and Corasaniti(1990) conducted a study of childcare in Texas and found opposite results to Anderrson - that children who attended daycare performed worse than otherwise. However, Texas has a much lower standard of daycare than Sweden.
The NICHD study (1999) which Belsky was involved with concluded that:
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The mothers who attend the local playgroup have found out that you are studying psychology and want to ask your advice about how to treat their children. Of course, you are not an expert in this field - yet! - but on the basis of your studies so far there are some conclusions that you are able to reach. What would you say to these mothers?
Answer: To this mother I would say that there are different schools of thought in psychology, and the there is not necessarily a consensus as to whether it would be possible to achieve these objectives. For example, some psychologists (e.g. Eysenck) would say that a person's character is largely a product of temperament, in which case there may be aspects that can't be shaped however you try.
However, it is true to say that there is a great deal of evidence suggesting that what happens in infancy can have an effect on later life. A major influencing factor is the bond between a mother and child. Researchers such as Bowlby, Rutter, Ainsworth, Schafer + Emerson, have all conducted studies which point to the fact that children who are brought up in a secure environment, with a mother who is sensitive to their needs benefit both at the time and in later life.
So the first suggestion would be to do whatever possible to make the child feel secure and cared for. Additionally cognitive psychologists (e.g. Rogers) would probably suggest that the child be treated with unconditional positive regard, which would help develop self-esteem.
Since the child is attending daycare, it may be worth mentioning that studies (Anderrson, NICHD) indicate that high quality daycare can have a positive effect on cognitive development. Whether this counts as "IQ" is a question I don't feel qualified to answer. But anyway the second suggestion would be that the mother should ensure that the playgroup is well run, and by qualified staff.
There is some evidence (NICHD) to suggest that children attending daycare may be more socially disruptive when they start school, but this doesn't appear to be a widely researched phenomenon, and so it's probably not worth taking the child out of daycare based on this.
Answer: I do not think it would be ethical for me to give advice to this mother, except for saying "See a specialist". However, privately I might reflect that maybe she was talking with John Bowlby, who probably would hold this point of view.
An other explanation I might privately reflect on would be that perhaps the child's problems could be rooted in a physiological condition. In other words, perhaps he is suffering from depression brought about by a chemical imbalance in the brain (which may in turn be caused by a physical illness, or perhaps drug use).
Alternatively, perhaps the structure of home-life is such that the older child has learned to display this kind of behaviour as a way of getting attention (perhaps Skinner or Watson would advance this view).
The long-term prospects for the child will depend on the underlying problem. For example, a physiological problem might be dealt with by medication, and a behavioural problem may be treated using some kind of behavioural therapy.
Answer: Research by Takahashi indicates that the culture of child-raising in Japan is characterised by the mother and child staying very close to one another, which tends to mean that the child is less able to tolerate being looked after by other adults. I would suggest to the lady that in my opinion, the Japanese "non collectivist" approach has much to commend it, and that unless the child is still quite young (i.e. below eighteen months), it may be difficult to change. I am not aware of any research that shows how she could accomplish her aim, but would suggest a behavioural approach such as systematic desensitisation.
Answer: I think that I would say that some psychologists would say that a child's behaviour is largely determined by temperament; that is, you can't change a person's character, and if the child is behaving badly then that's their fault and not yours. Perhaps some cognitive therapy (for the mother) would help her feel less guilty about this.